& I'll keep you locked up in the trunk in my mind

Okay so you may have heard this band just broke up.  You may have also heard a certian rumor about sprout.  Well, haha, said rumor is true.  The fag had sex with a 16 year old girl.  And how old is he..hmm...32?(I think, either that or 34)  Thats an 18 year age difference.  I hope his ass rots in prison.  He ruined everything for his band.  Not only that, but for the icing on the cake, the girl goes to my school!  Yea.  Pathetic.

http://brainleekage.blogspot.com/

So I've been writting A TON lately and I was wondering if I could get some feed back, positive or negative, on a poem I'm in the process of writting.  It might even turn out to be a song.  Either way, I'd like your thoughts.  If you think it totally sucks its okay haha.

okay so I seem to get this question often - Uhm what does your username mean??

Okay I don't know why so many people have asked but here it is - A painter paints his pictures on a canvas. But musicians paint their pictures on silence.  Get it now haha?

okay so I had to write a poem for preschool lab about child abuse so I thought I'd post it on here.  Its the shortest thing I ever written but I'm not good at writing about something I've never actually been through.

Daddy's large fist, red on my face.
Mommy screams in disgrace.
His hands smell of sweat and dew.
My face is now black and blue.

Mommy screams "No, Stop!  She's just a little girl!"
But that didn't stop daddy from giving me one more hurl.
Daddy's now in prison, and mommy's in distress
Because that night, daddy laid me to rest.

Like it?  Love it?  Hate it?
Let me know people :]

I was editing it and changed two small things, which one do you guys like better?(if any)

Daddy's large fist, red on my face.
Mommy screams in in so much disgrace.
His hands smell of sweat and poo.
My face is now black and blue.

Mommy screams "No, Stop it!  She's my little girl!"
that didn't stop him from giving me one more hurl.
Daddy's now in prision, and mommy's in distress
Because on that very night, daddy laid me to rest.

So yeah I wrote this, its about my brother.  It's not my best but there is just something about it that I like.  I hope you like it....